It was at an airport gate that I realized just what a flawed child of God I am. For second time within an hour, my flight had been delayed. As we lined up at the desk to check on connections and get re-routed, we tried to contain our frustration. Some of us were more successful than others. A lady in front of me was less than successful...in a spectacular fashion.
She complained loudly while waiting for her turn at the desk. She yelled and berated the attendant when she reached the front of the line. The patient airline employee kept her cool, apologizing profusely all the while trying to placate her. There was no smoothing of ruffled feathers this time. The only thing that would satisfy this passenger would be to turn back time and avoid the delay.
Her demands not met, she returned to her seat. She continued to complain loudly and bitterly. She threatened, she disparaged and maligned the airline, the attendants and anyone else she could think of. It made me profoundly embarrassed to be a fellow passenger. I had no desire to lumped into any group with this incredibly rude person.
As she continued her tirade, the gentleman in front of me began his negotiations with the attendant. In contrast, he was calm and kind. He patiently tried to explain his dilemma. However, it was easy to see he was becoming rattled by his fellow passenger's unending barrage of complaints. Finally he stopped mid sentence and turned toward her. "Ma'am, you need to relax. This is something they can't do anything about and it is time for you to step back and be quiet." For one brief moment there was shocked silence throughout the gate. I wanted to raise my hands and cheer. I wanted to slap him on the back and urge him to continue to confront her. As I looked around, I realized I wasn't alone in my feelings. All the other passengers seemed to feel the same way. You could read it on their faces. There was profound relief that someone had taken on the devil in a blue dress and shut her down.
Unfortunately he did not shut her down. She may have lowered her volume a tiny bit, but she continued to grumble. The other passengers and myself increased our distance from her. It was a great relief for everybody when we all boarded.
On the flight home I reflected on what had happened. I loved that someone had come to the defense of the beleaguered gate attendants. I relished that justice had been doled out. Then I started thinking beyond by own sense of fairness. Sure the lady was wrong and there was no excuse for her behavior. But what could have happened in her life or even that day that would cause her to think that it was okay to be so vocal in her opinions. What had people done to her in the past that would teach her that yelling at someone was an okay response?
What would have happened if I instead of silently cheering had gone and sat next her and told her I was willing to listen? I have to think she got the kind of reaction she was used. What could I have done to give her a different kind of reaction?
And aren't those the questions we should ask ourselves everyday as rocks are thrown into our paths. Job and his friends shook their fists at God and pontificated about fairness. Yet they failed to grasp that our sense of fairness is not even close to the concept of a God created grace and mercy. Our job is not seek fairness and justice, but to be bearers of grace and mercy. We not only need to remove the rocks before us, but also the rocks lying in the paths of others.
May God forgive my blindness.
Tim
